Wanted: Christmas Spirit

image from Flicker 

Welcome to a special blog post! Here is where the randomness rears its head on this blog.

I just needed to send this question out into the universe.

Are you searching for Christmas spirit this year?

I have gone through waves of disappointment, embarrassment or complete indifference this past month as I thought about this question. I guess it is because my usual traditions are not working. Let me explain.

I live in New Jersey. If you live on the east coast right now, you might understand where I am going with this. It is usually quite cold this time of year. We even get ice and snow. However, this year we have record temperature in the wrong direction. The day I went into the NYC with my mom, it was close to 80 degrees outside. Looking at the Rockefeller Tree felt odd. Watching people skate in Rockefeller Rink in shorts was weird. Looking at the windows while sweating was weird. My trip to New York City with my mom to enjoy some windows, the tree, shopping and tea had gotten too weird. Did I say weird enough yet? No? Just making sure. I love going to have some tea while looking at beautiful lights but on that day, it felt like it was a typical spring day in the city.

Another tradition of mine, baking cookies, did not even help. I was indifferent to that. It was something that needed to be done.  I helped out. It felt like a chore instead of something that could be fun to do with my family. That didn’t stop me from eating my weight in cookies, but I digress.

I don’t know if it is the warm weather. I don’t know if my traditions that I adore are failing me. Maybe it is my age. I am getting older. I didn’t even have anything to put on a list for my family. I told them to get me anything for Christmas. I will be happy with anything.

I will say that I am excited for my family to open the presents I got them this year. I’ve noticed that over the month. I felt that twinge of Christmas spirit when I was wrapping the gifts I bought for my family.

Maybe, just maybe, the reason not all my traditions are putting me in the Christmas spirit is because they are juvenile. Not that being juvenile cannot be fun, but age seems to change how I approach the holidays now.

I would rather just spend time with my family doing something spontaneous than preplanned traditions that I have done so many times before. I like buying presents for them that reference inside jokes or something they have been looking at and haven’t bought for themselves. That gives me twinges of Christmas spirit. It warms the cold cockles of my heart to think about my family being happy. Not me, just my family.

How do you feel this holiday season? Are you full of the Christmas spirit or are you like me? Struggling to understand what went wrong this year?

In closing, I will say that I still have hope that Christmas spirit will find its way back to my heart. I may only be for one day, but one day is better than never happening at all.

Until Wednesday, the randomness has ended. Hope you enjoyed.

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